A Philosophical Perspective on Continuing Life……

1 Oct

What is the Point of Life…..?

Life in general and, at the most basic level, has only one purpose; the proliferation of the gene pool.  The only ‘pleasure’ I get is when escaping reality through the use of Heroin, Valium, Alcohol or combinations thereof.  Only then do I get relief from the sadness of feeling alone and feeling that there is no reason to exist.  Life has nothing to offer me other than the enslavement by a capitalist society.  Capitalism dictates that money is a necessity in getting any enjoyment from living.  Being at the bottom level of a capitalist society, the basic things I need to survive ie; food, shelter, clothing, warmth and water consume every penny I have or could realistically ever hope to earn, leaving nothing with which to pay for ‘enjoyment’ because all enjoyment comes with a price tag.  That is the reality of living within a capitalist society.  That is not life; that is survival.  It is the modern equivalent of slavery.  Slaves were, and are, forced to work to get the minimum requirements needed to survive.  I see comparable similarities between enforced slavery through capitalism.  Modern life is effectively enslavement through capitalism, which affects those at the margins of society more than those who are further up the capitalist system……

And Who Really Cares…..?

Truth be told, nobody.  If I were to die, how long would it be before anybody noticed?  I suspect a long time.  My phone never rings.  My friends are all wrapped up in their own struggles to exist, spending most of their waking hours chained to a job they probably hate so they can earn enough to eat and keep a roof over their heads.  And, in the time they can call their own they are slaves to the things they have to do to exist outside of the dismal 9 to 5.  What miniscule amount of time they have left they spend struggling to enjoy themselves and, more often than not, use alcohol or drugs to kid themselves they too are having a ‘good’ time until they are forced to conform to generate the income to perpetuate the process.  Try asking anybody you know ‘how’s life?’ and not one of them will say ‘it’s great’; most likely they will say ‘well you know, plodding on, trying to keep my head above water’.  That’s a fact; I’ve tried it……

What does the Future have to Offer….?

For me, living at the margins of society, a never ending struggle to survive with all of the ongoing misery previously described.  Looking forward to old age, the money supply needed to survive will dwindle even further and I will find myself with less then than I have now, with the added complications of deteriorating health.  That isn’t living, that is just more slow painful torture to be suffered until the inevitable happens.  Sadly, the majority of people die alone not surrounded by their friends and family……

Why Continue to Carry on in Abject Misery?

Fear of death doesn’t scare me.  The fear of death is not about dying; it’s about the fear of pain at the moment of death.  Take away any pain and dying holds no fear.  What would I miss if I were gone?  I would miss out on the knowledge of the big questions that I ponder about the nature of existence and my purpose within the universe but, I have reached the conclusion that those questions will never be answered no matter how long I wait.  The answers always seem to throw up more questions than.  It is as if the answers are always over the horizon and the closer to the horizon you get, the further it moves away.  As is apparent from the number of great scientist who died alone in Psychiatric institutions, the deepest contemplations and feelings that the answers are within their grasp can lead to madness.  There is a fine line between genius and madness……

The Alternative to Carrying On….?

I don’t want to wake up and feel misery every day.  It’s painful, tedious and boring.  I gain no pleasure from waking up to same shit everyday and I do not believe it will ever change; it will only get worse.  The dizzying questions of the nature of existence only drive one closer to madness.  The escape that drugs used offer, only work in ever increasing quantities, deigned to me by the escalating costs.  The only real escape is the permanent one.  Then I’ll never have to wake up again, I’ll never be miserable again, I’ll never have to think about the future again and I won’t have to get old and waste away in poverty without any pleasure to miss out on, until the inevitable decline happens.  It’s going to happen anyway; that is certain.  I just want to cut out the sadness, the pain and the time.  Einstein tells us time ticks at a different rate dependent on your perspective and relevant position.  I would go further, to say that time beats at differing rates to the individual.  In the unfulfilled time beats very slowly, compounding the misery of the individual……

To Be, or Not to Be…….

 

This is the ultimate question and one which only I can take.  The balance of ‘to be, or not to be’, draws every closer to a final choice; to continue to wait for the ‘to be’ answers which I don’t feel will every offer a solution, or to take an early exit from the traumatic and ultimately destructive nature caused by the time spent waiting for the answers.  The scales are tilting ever further toward the choice of ending the pain suffered in waiting for the inherently unanswerable questioned which continue to throw up more questions than answers……

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