Felicity Kendal’s Eyebrows (and other celebrity body parts)

2 Nov

Eyebrows, Foreheads & Botox

During the last few weeks I have had the displeasure of being exposed to a television program called ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ (predominantly due to the female presence in my household), in which ‘Z’ list celebrity have beens attempt to grasp onto the remnants of their careers and pray for the day the phone rings and their agent says “I’ve found you part in the pantomime in Dewsbury”. Anyway, whilst watching said program I have noticed the complete lack of any movement in the area immediately above Felicity Kendal’s eyes. Is this down to the overuse of Botox I ask myself? I think it probably is. Though Felicity is wearing well for a lady of her years, she is, like most of today’s celebrities, refusing to grow old gracefully and injecting poison into her face to avoid having the lines one naturally acquires with age and wisdom. During the last few shows Felicity has expressed her surprise at not having been eliminated from this appalling excuse for entertainment, although her eyebrows disagreed. She also expressed her distress at the self promoting, overly camp, panels comments. Again her eyebrows appeared to disagree. In fact at no point since the inception of this awful program has Felicity Kendal’s forehead moved at all……

I will be watching future episodes with anticipation of the merest hint of movement in Felicity’s forehead and wonder how an actress of her merit is able to convey any emotion whatsoever without the use of her eyebrows……

Teeth Whitening

While I’m on the subject of celebrity face fads, what’s the deal with the teeth? It would seem that the American obsession with teeth that are whiter than an Albinos pubes has drifted across the Atlantic and landed squarely on our super high definition televisions. I’m not suggesting that white teeth are not in any way attractive, but when you need a pair of welder’s goggles to look at them it’s all gone a bit far. (see Simon Cowell for details, but have your glasses at the ready)……


Now we’re talking. The girl is completely obsessed with cosmetic procedures. Does she not have any mirrors in her house? She used to be a fairly attractive, if slightly dumb, young lady. Now she’s had so much filler pumped into her face, she’s started to look like Pete Burns with two pumpkins stuck down her top on Halloween. Jordan, if you’re reading this, GET A GRIP……

And Finally

I fucking hate hollow, talent less, Z list celebrities who are only famous for shagging someone, claiming to have shagged someone or working their way up the list to Y by trying to shag someone. Their only contribution to society is a demonstration of how become someone by doing fuck all. Hardly Albert Einstein, Sir Isaac Newton or Winston Churchill, are they……

Ahh, that’s better……..


One Response to “Felicity Kendal’s Eyebrows (and other celebrity body parts)”

  1. Jo Mc November 8, 2010 at 1:00 pm #

    Now that more like it **********, good honest ramblings of botox and taking the piss!
    Much more amusing and i bet you had more fun wrting it!
    Anyway, having said that, i do love abit of Strictly and i also love to take the piss out of all the celebs but also enjoy watching the ones whom improve through out the programme!
    I hate the unfair voting of the idiotic general public!
    But there you go, there wouldn’t by a show if not for the votings over the phone!
    A very sad state of affairs indeed!
    Much love

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